Becca’s Chava Chat: So Love Has Blinded You?

Becca’s Chava Chat: So Love Has Blinded You?

Becca's Chava Chat

Valentine’s Day is almost upon us and some would say, “Love is in the air.” Of course, there are others that would go out of their way to avoid such romanticized cliché and literally dodge Cupid’s Arrow all together. On the other hand, is it really possible to prevent Love from happening? To deny someone, even thyself, the right to experience natural emotions such as, desire, attraction, and affection would be considered inhumane and could possibly lead to a cataclysmal mental state. Or maybe I’m just a bit overdramatic and rhapsodized than most. After all, I didn’t obtain the nicknames “Angel B” or “Aphrodite” of the old Hyperspace Blogs for my lack of romantic flair. I guess it would be fair to say, I’m in love with the idea of (being in) Love.

“Are you allowed to love? I thought that was forbidden for a Jedi?” Padme

“Attachment is forbidden. Possession is forbidden. Compassion, which I would define as unconditional love, is essential to a Jedi’s life. So you might say that we are encouraged to love.” Anakin

are you allowed to love

Am I the only one who finds this dialogue between our two star-crossed lovers so fascinating, yet ingenious? You’re probably asking yourself, why in Nine Corellian Hells would she think that? Think about it, Coffee with Kenobi style; through a critical lens or standpoint. Anakin is literally trying not only to convince Padme, but himself, in an argumentative rationalization of the dogmatic Jedi Code that he can indeed, be in Love.

According to Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia the definition of Unconditional love is known as affection without any limitations. It can be also love without conditions. This term is sometimes associated with other terms such as true altruism, complete love, or “mother’s/father’s love.”

So yes, Anakin had true validity in his explanation of ventilation according to this definition. Makes me wonder, just how long had he been waiting and wanting to recite this justification to the woman he adored from afar for nearly over a decade.

Are you an angel

“Are you an angel?”-Anakin

“What?”-Padme

“An angel, I’ve heard the deep space pilots talk about them. They’re the most beautiful creatures in the universe. They live on the moon of Iego, I think.”-Anakin

Make fun of the romantics and dialogue all you want, but I’ve always loved the interaction in this scene between the young lovers to be. Seriously, even Mr. Smoothie himself, Lando Calrissian couldn’t top that one. Still, once Anakin set his sights on something, even at the tender age of nine or ten, he usually got what he wanted. Just lucky I guess.

In my experience, there is no such thing as luck.”Obi-Wan Kenobi

Ok, so maybe that’s based solely on one’s point of view. Either way, his persistence definitely paid off; in some ways more than others.

“I swear to you… I didn’t ask to be put on the council.” –Anakin

“But it’s what you wanted.” –Obi-Wan Kenobi

its what you wanted

Eventually, Anakin’s incessant pursuit of Padme’s affections triumphed over her typical unwavering rationale and ultimately, and she gave in to love.

“I truly… deeply… love you and before we die I want you to know.” –Padme

As a politician most of her life, she had no time for frivolity such as courtship and romance. Padme had a serious outlook on life and took it upon herself at a young age to dedicate her time to help those in need…to bring hope to those who had none. Although, looking closely at her upbringing, it’s amazing that she didn’t pursue the homemaker route like her mother or her sister Sola. Padme was indeed well-loved by her entire family and greatly supported in her career choice as well.

Padme family

However, as seen in this deleted scene from AOTC, it is apparent that her sister and her mother know Padme a little better than she knows herself or her heart. Again proving my point, love isn’t something you can avoid. Perhaps Anakin said it best when he stated, “Believe me, I wish I could just wish away my feelings, but I can’t.”

Oh, you can say that Anakin was more obsessed than enamored by Padme, but I’d have to disagree, at least to some extent. Padme was so much more than just some trophy girlfriend, yes siree, her intellect and natural ability or desire to nurture all beings set her apart from not only her colleagues, but most of the galaxy as well. Oddly enough, her own daughter said it best and simply put, too…”She was very beautiful, kind, but sad.” Or perhaps, this deleted scene will help justify my personal assumption.

My point is Anakin never misinterpreted his feelings for Padme, so much so, knowing exactly what he was getting into. Anakin knew (in my opinion) how difficult any relationship with her was going to be, but he just had to have her as his own, no matter the cost. To put it simply, Anakin didn’t have on Rosy Goggles when he was with her, he was 100% smitten. In fact, curiously enough, the same cannot be said where Padme is concerned.

blinded

“So love has blinded you?” –Padme

It’s ironic, she questioned his love, his judgment on their marriage, but it was she who was blinded by love. All the signs were there, yet she refused to see, clouded by circumstance and in love with the idea of being in love.

“…..but love is blind, and lovers cannot see what petty follies they, themselves commit.” –William Shakespeare

Remember…

this IS the Podcast you’re looking for!

beccab@coffeewithkenobi.com

Follow me on Twitter @urangelb

Becca@thecantinacast.net

 

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26 Comments

  1. lazypadawan
    January 21, 2015 at 10:50 Reply

    Great piece!

    My only slight disagreement is with Padme being in love with love. Certainly she is smart and rational enough to see the red flags, but I also think that she is, as Sidious says in TPM, naive. She believes wholeheartedly in the good of (almost) everyone, especially Anakin. Even when Obi-Wan tells her Anakin has fallen to the Dark Side, she believes she could still save him. And even after he attacks her and breaks her heart, she still believes there is good in him. On that count, she was right but it would take her progeny and another couple of decades to validate that belief. I think the last shot we see of Padme kind of says it all…her corpse is hanging on to the japor snippet, a symbol of Anakin’s goodness and innocence, as though she never gave up on him.

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 21, 2015 at 20:07 Reply

      *lazyPadawan*

      Hey there! Thanks for the read and the feedback, always appreciated.

      And BTW, I fully agree with you that Padme never gave up on Anakin and I have never doubted that for one second. Perhaps my reasoning/theorizing was misconstrued? Relating back to my own relationships in my late teens through my mid-twenties, I can see how she could’ve got “caught up” in the moment, so to speak. Just wanting to hang on to the person, to the relationship so badly that you don’t honestly see what’s really happening. Regardless of love, their relationship was deteriorating, along with everything else around them. I know that feeling all to well, being pregnant and scared…desperately hanging on so as to be that perfect family you have imagined since you were a little girl. Trust me she has, in some way, she has fantasied of having a family. IMO this is obvious in those deleted scenes, her sister and mother facial expressions make it apparently so. By ROTS, her typical rationale isn’t nearly as strong as it was in AOTC and she is clouded by her love for Anakin to see just how “lost” he truly is. Hence, she is blinded by love. Just my own thoughts of course 🙂

      1. lazypadawan
        January 21, 2015 at 21:07 Reply

        OK, I see your point.

  2. Alyssa Burk
    January 21, 2015 at 14:42 Reply

    You used my YouTube video! So cool. I’m JediGirl15. Cool you used it. I just filmed it off my tv with my iPad. Great review.

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 21, 2015 at 19:52 Reply

      Thanks so much, Alyssa 🙂 Couldn’t believe it was the only video clip of this scene available. Glad I found it and thanks for recording it, it fit perfectly.

  3. Carsten Savage
    January 21, 2015 at 20:51 Reply

    Awesome once again!

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 22, 2015 at 13:26 Reply

      Thank you so much for saying so 🙂 Always appreciated.

  4. A Couple Of Interesting Essays About Padmé |
    January 21, 2015 at 21:12 Reply

    […] at Coffee With Kenobi posted “So Love Has Blinded You”, an interesting look at Padmé’s love for […]

  5. ladylavinia1932
    January 21, 2015 at 22:39 Reply

    I don’t agree that Padme was “BLINDED” by love. That theory makes Anakin as someone whom no one should fall in love with. Or that there is something special about Anakin that makes him particularly susceptible to evil. I do not buy it. She knew what type of person Anakin basically was.

    All of the major characters had the potential to succumb to evil. That is what made them individuals. Sentient beings. Even Padme. I’ll bet anyone that deep down, she thought the Tusken Raiders deserved what Anakin had dished out to them. After all, she knew Shmi Skywalker. And I bet she was horrified by what the Tuskens did to Anakin’s mother. There was nothing morally pure or ideal about her, Anakin or anyone else. So this idea that she was “blinded” by love really annoys me. It sounds like an argument that tries to mix morality with love. And it doesn’t work with me.

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 22, 2015 at 13:42 Reply

      ladylavinia1932,

      I’m sorry if my entry offended you in any way, trust me, that was not my intention. The POV that I was trying to convey was this:

      The dialogue itself, “So love has blinded you?” is an *ironic* question. Padme is questioning if Anakin’s love is strictly based or biased on her appearance aka beauty. She says this due to the fact that only moments before, she was daydreaming about their *relationship* and where to raise the baby(ies); “I can go early and fix up the baby’s room. I know the perfect spot, right next to the gardens.”

      He then responds with, “You’re so beautiful.” Which obviously doesn’t mesh at all with what she was just saying only moments ago. So she just assumes he’s captivated by what he considers to be beautiful therefore, he must be blinded by love. As I said in my earlier commentary to *lazypadawn* :

      Relating back to my own relationships in my late teens through my mid-twenties, I can see how she could’ve got “caught up” in the moment, so to speak. Just wanting to hang on to the person, to the relationship so badly that you don’t honestly see what’s really happening. Regardless of love, their relationship was deteriorating, along with everything else around them. I know that feeling all to well, being pregnant and scared…desperately hanging on so as to be that perfect family you have imagined since you were a little girl. Trust me she has, in some way, she has fantasied of having a family. IMO this is obvious in those deleted scenes, her sister and mother facial expressions make it apparently so. By ROTS, her typical rationale isn’t nearly as strong as it was in AOTC and she is clouded by her love for Anakin to see just how “lost” he truly is. Hence, she is blinded by love.

      For the record, I LOVE the story behind Anakin and Padme. So much so, I have written my own collection of Fan-fiction on the two. There’s no doubt that they loved each other very much and unfortunately, that love came with Dire Consequences. IMO

      Thank you so much for the feedback, very much appreciated.

  6. M. Marshall
    January 22, 2015 at 01:03 Reply

    “To deny someone, even thyself, the right to experience natural emotions such as, desire, attraction, and affection would be considered inhumane and could possibly lead to a cataclysmal mental state.”

    We all have to deny ourselves at some point in time, especially if that desire, attraction and affection can lead us down a dangerous path.

    But I’m always thinking about Anakin and Padme’s marriage and I think the reason for Padme’s attraction to Anakin is because she can identify with his frustration with the Jedi Order. Both had been thrown into their roles at a very young age and never had a chance to have a normal childhood. They want to do great things for the galaxy but corruption and apathy keep getting in the way. Padme kicked the Trade Federation out of Naboo and yet, they were never punished for their crimes. She wants to stop a clone army from being created and nearly gets assassinated 3 times. She wants to start a rebellion against Palpatine but liberty dies with thunderous applause. So when she spends time with Anakin and hears about his desire to become a great jedi, but clashes with Obi-Wan and the Jedi Order, you can see the wheels in her head turning in that packing suitcase scene. She might also be thinking that if she can’t be there for the Republic, she can be there for this melancholy, handsome young man.

    Well that’s my spin on it.

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 22, 2015 at 13:55 Reply

      M. Marshall,

      I agree, “We all have to deny ourselves at some point in time, especially if that desire, attraction and affection can lead us down a dangerous path.”

      Yet, choosing to avoid “love” isn’t as easy as saying, “I’m not taking the bus today, I think I’ll walk instead.” There are just *certain* things we have no control over…at least to a certain extent.

      And yes, I do believe Padme was able to identify/relate to Anakin and if nothing else, wanted to lash out at life’s “unfairness” as much as he did. Honestly, in TPM and AOTC I believe she was truly enthralled with his total outlook on life in general. The way he spoke, not just to her, but in all situations…it made her think.

      Thanks for reading and for the comment too 🙂

  7. ladylavinia1932
    January 22, 2015 at 10:30 Reply

    [“We all have to deny ourselves at some point in time, especially if that desire, attraction and affection can lead us down a dangerous path.”]

    The only thing really dangerous about Padme falling in love with Anakin was their decision to engage in a secret marriage. They should have been open about it. To label Anakin as a “dangerous path” is to believe that there is something special that makes him susceptible to evil. And ALL OF THEM – Padme included – had something that made them susceptible to evil.

    And I do get tired of people trying to rationalize Padme’s attraction to Anakin, as if it was some kind of psychiatric case. You can’t rationalize love. And I get the feeling that you’re really using Anakin’s eventual fate as a Sith Lord as an excuse for why Padme should have “deny” her feelings for him, not his role as a Jedi acolyte.

    There was nothing WRONG about Padme marrying Anakin. There was a great deal wrong about them keeping their marriage a secret. They should have been honest about it.

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 22, 2015 at 22:14 Reply

      While I completely respect your passion, I must reiterate that no one is *implying* that their relationship was wrong. Again, we’re only expressing our opinions and nobody is right or wrong for having a POV.

      And yes, I agree with you, their marriage should not have been kept a secret.

      May the Force be with you 🙂

  8. Scott Murray (@MrScottMurray)
    January 22, 2015 at 22:40 Reply

    I actually look at that scene very different. I don’t even think Padme is literally questioning Anakin at all. You’re right when you say his “You are so beautiful” remark doesn’t mesh with her talk about married life.

    She probably hears him say that a lot and it can be tough to know how to respond to that a compliment like that…so, she originally just tries to match it with something equally expressive by saying it’s only because she loves him so much.

    BUT THEN, he decides to not even leave it at that and says “No, no”…it’s because HE is so in love with HER. (It’s almost like the whole “I love you more”, “No, I love you more” thing.)

    Now she has to say something back, and since returning the verbal affection wasn’t working…she threw him a curve ball to break it up with “So love has blinded you?” (hence why I think she says it with a little bit of a smile)

    And it does throw him off his game a bit and forces him to stop trying to out-gush her. Personally, I don’t think there was much more going on than that. But, you’re right when it comes to young love saying things like that all the time.

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 25, 2015 at 13:59 Reply

      Hi Scott 🙂

      [It’s almost like the whole “I love you more”, “No, I love you more” thing.]

      Interesting take and I can totally see this now that you’ve pointed it out. It shows the maturity (or lack of it) level of their relationship when taking it in this context.

      You’re making me go “hmm” 🙂 Thanks for the feedback! Very much appreciated.

  9. Ryder
    January 23, 2015 at 00:49 Reply

    So great once again, Becca! Really enjoyed it!

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 25, 2015 at 14:00 Reply

      Thanks, Ryder! You truly are far too gracious. 🙂

  10. Melinda
    January 23, 2015 at 10:16 Reply

    Actually, Becca, I just visited Jay’s most recent blog post — about attachment — and I noted that Anakin’s exchange with Padme aboard the transport was … well, rather logical. (Did you ever think you’d hear me use that adjective associated with Anakin? 😉 ) It is. 🙂

    (Who would have thought there would be a Wikipedia entry for ‘unconditional love’? 😉 )

    “…just how long had he been waiting and wanting to recite this justification…”: Calls to mind a time long, long, looooooooooooooooooong ago when I worshiped — from afar –a boy in my eighth-grade class. Sometimes we never do tell “the object of our adoration” just how we feel. Much too shy I was (back then!). 😉

    [Can you tell I’m going back and forth through your blog, scrolling down here to leave comments as I read? I really should read through your musings in their entirety before commenting, but I don’t want to lose my train of thought … or forget some pearl. 😉 ]

    You know, Becca, it always astounds me how imminent death will spur one to say, admit something to another (re: Padme’s declaration of love for Anakin as they are being wheeled into the Geonosis arena … so reminiscent of the Colosseum in Rome). Of course, it doesn’t have to be an admission of love, but it was in Padme’s case. When they survived, she had to own up to those feelings, and act on them (or not). I wonder what would have happened if she had told Anakin she would NOT act on them, had kept her distance from him. Just musing …

    more…

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 25, 2015 at 14:07 Reply

      I so L O V E your responses Melinda 🙂

      Like you, I have often wondered about that too…had Padme not admitted her feelings for Anakin at that time or, if she had NOT acted on pursuing a commitment with him…how would HE have reacted? Of course, any other scenario means we wouldn’t have our story 😉 lol

  11. Pam Bruchwalski
    January 23, 2015 at 10:26 Reply

    As a huge fan of the love story at the heart of Star Wars, this subject is near and dear to my heart. Even so, the whole “so love has blinded you” scene in ROTS has never held a lot of weight for me. I see it as sweet flirting between a couple who doesn’t have much time for frivolity in their lives, a glimpse into the beautifully sappy love story of Anakin and Padme, the story we don’t get to see enough of but which had to exist.

    I wrote a lot of blogs over the years in the Hyperspace blogosphere, well over 100 entries. Combing through them just now, I see that a vast majority of them have to do with Anakin, Padme, their love, their parenthood, etc, but I can’t find one about that scene, specifically.

    It’s a matter of one’s definition of love, and like everything else in this world, perspectives on and definitions of love vary.

    I do believe that it is impossible to prevent loving feelings. You feel what you feel or as Selena Gomez says all over the airwaves these days, “The heart wants what it wa-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a-a–ants.” It’s what you do about it that you can control.

    I love the movie The Adjustment Bureau with Matt Damon and Emily Blunt. No matter how hard otherworldly entities try to rip them apart, they eventually fight to be together…and win. The universe changes its plan to accommodate their love. Anakin and Padme should have done the same, especially once they learned they would be parents.

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 25, 2015 at 14:14 Reply

      I Love that song lol! Yeah, big fan of the bubble gum pop 😉

      And you’re so right, the heart does want it what it wants…

      The love story surrounding the PT is what drew me back in with Star Wars. Funny, I relate a lot of my childhood with the OT and my adulthood with the PT. Perhaps … if looking at the whole scope of things, the PT does cover more adult situations than the OT does. Of course, this is just my POV.

      Thanks for taking the time to read and comment 🙂 I really appreciate it.

  12. Melinda
    January 23, 2015 at 10:41 Reply

    continued…

    You know that (first) deleted scene on Naboo that you included? I remember watching it on one of the dvds … wishing it would have been included in the finished product of AOTC. Yes, I understand that not every scene filmed will make it into the finished product. But this scene adds some depth to Padme’s character, shows another side to her, and gives the first onscreen inkling regarding her feelings for the Jedi padawan (just look at her face when she’s chatting with Sola in the kitchen). Also, I love watching Anakin’s reactions to the brief moments when Padme’s nieces come running out to greet their aunt. It touches his heart, and it’s evident — at least to me — that he is a bit wistful for his own mother. Makes the driving force behind his intent to journey to Tatooine all the more intense, and understandable. As a mother, I love the exchange at the dinner table when Padme’s mother says: “I know. I know, but I had to say it. Now it’s done.” 😉 Sometimes I find myself in that same situation. 😉

    Becca, what wonderful, wonderful musings you have posed here. 🙂 I always am captivated by your take on Star Wars, its characters, its messages. True, I see things differently than you do at times, but I always come away from reading one of your blogs with a wider interpretation of the story’s themes. 🙂 Thank you very, very much! 🙂

    In some respects, maybe Anakin wasn’t always blinded by love — but I think he was at the end. Otherwise, he would not have accused Padme of turning against him, joining forces with Obi-Wan. Of course, there were other forces clouding Anakin’s reasoning — the Dark Side. He turned away from the two people who could help him the most. 🙁 As I watch Anakin turn, all I want to do is reach into the movie screen, shake him and make him see the folly of the turn he has taken. Silly that may seem, but I always feel that way.

    more…

    1. Becca Benjamin
      January 25, 2015 at 14:24 Reply

      OMGosh! Me too [the deleted scene at Padme’s parents home]!

      The facial expressions are enough and add so much more depth to their budding relationship. At that point, that moment, Anakin was TRULY a family boy/man at heart; his look says it all.

      Padme too! Even though, at an early age she decided to dedicate her time/herself to the Common Good of the Galaxy, she loved the “idea” of the possibility of a family. I believe…at one point on the old Hyperspace blogs I referred to her as “The Mother of the Galaxy.” She truly was, she gave it HOPE by bestowing her only children to salvage it from the Empire.

  13. Melinda
    January 23, 2015 at 11:00 Reply

    continued…

    Becca, this was quite thought-provoking. 🙂 Brought up all kinds of ideas, musings, thoughts. When you wrote: “I’m in love with the idea of (being in) Love”, I couldn’t help but think about someone I knew back when I was in my late 20s (she was in her mid-20s at the time). We met when she was in the early stages of her divorce. She and her husband had been married just shy of two years. When queried as to what led her to file for divorce, she explained that, while she cared for her soon-to-be-ex-husband, she did not love him. “I think I was in love with the idea of getting married,” she admitted. I remember those words so well these 25+ years later! I admired her for being so forthright, yet found myself being rather amazed that she did not know her heart well enough before she walked down the aisle. She could have saved both herself and her husband the turmoil of terminating their marriage — and her parents the expense of the big wedding they gave their daughter. I know this tale is a bit afield of your theme, yet it does call into question just how well we know — or think we know — our emotions. Was Anakin blinded by his love for Padme? Was she blinded by her love for Anakin? Who can say for sure. Sadly, events in which the two star-crossed lovers found themselves conspired against their chance at true happiness. The snippets of time they were able to steal to be together certainly didn’t help matters any.

    Wonderful, wonderful blog, Becca! I can’t wait for your next one! 🙂

    MTFBWY 🙂

  14. Becca Benjamin
    January 25, 2015 at 14:29 Reply

    Wow! That’s an incredible story … just…Wow!

    Thank you so much for all your thoughts and feedback, I truly do appreciate it 🙂
    xo

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